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Archive for September 12th, 2010

The mere thought of phone sex sends me screaming up the walls, but then I have a very good reason for hating mobile phones, my boss. He lives with his mobile glued to his ear, perhaps it has become a sexual organ for him. He calls me with unbelievable requests, I answer and say "fuck you, you can’t be serious?" Is this phone sex with my boss? Is this passage sex with my boss – when we pass each other in the passages at work and say "fuck you" to each other, not sotto voice, but with the right amount of volume and venom!

No matter where he goes in the world, he phones and asks what I want brought back. When he goes to Amsterdam, I ask for a big black dildo from the sex shop, could this possibly be construed as having phone sex with my boss? I am not sure, but the point of the exercise it to try and put him in a compromising position. I believe he knows this and this is the reason why I never go my dildo. Perhaps he was nervous that his luggage may be inspected by customs of that the sex shop salesperson would think he was gay.

Phones and sex don’t mix as far as I am concerned, when you have had your boss call you up at three in the morning, only for you to shout, "are you fucking insane calling me at this time, I thought someone had died" perhaps you will realize whey I feel this way about mixing these two items. But someone may have believed from the conve rsation I was into necrophilia and phone sex.

I have used the word "fuck" to my boss on the phone so many times that in retrospect I suppose this could be construed by someone who doesn’t know better, as phone sex.

He would phone me up and ask me to talk to him, so I would make up disgusting sex stories and anyone listening, couldn’t believe their ear. They would ask me who was on the phone, I replied "my boss of course". I think they believed I was having phone sex with my boss!