Most men aren’t clear on what they think makes for a a great lover , but many would give their left nut to become one.
So what make his partner sigh and want more?
What makes a man so appealing and successful with women?
First off, women like to be listened to. Yes it sounds corny but its true with many women.
Alot of women like to feel that they are communicating and one with their partner, and they are more likely to feel relaxed with him when they have intercourse . Being more relaxed can lead to better sex.
Also a man that pays attention to his partner will make her feel like she is important and not just another body to him. (yes including the one night stands fellas)
Most men that women consider great lovers actually are the type of men who arent selfish and focus on his lover.. That makes a big difference from a man who just doesnt realise sex is meant for two. Not just him getting off and thats it!.. Men like this are either
1-ignorant and not worth it
2- inexperienced and have no idea she needs to get off too.Its not all about him.
Also a man who touches women gently and doesn’t rush when he is kissing, touching or stroking makes a woman feel good Women like foreplay and many need that arousal as women are not the same as men and cant just be ready when expected.
So many men want to get through the kissing and the foreplay in a rush and go straight to the sex, but women don’t feel that way. It certainly isn’t the way to excite and stimulate most women.
And of course, what really makes a great lover ,is the fact he knows her body. He knows that most women are turned on by gentle bites on the neck and throat while being held from behind. He knows that gently pulling her head back with her hair while kissing her is very exciting for a lot of women.
He also pays attention during sex, and listens to the sounds she makes - or doesn’t make.
He works his way gradually and around her body. If something makes her pull back, and if he is paying enough attention to her, he will stop immediately knowing she doesnt like it. Move onto something else.
The lover a woman remembers afterward,isnt someone who just stuck his tool in her and had sex and that is it. It also isnt a male who rolls off and leaves or stands up to shake off and take a piss 5min later. Take notice fellas, women require the full focus on them. A great lover isnt just someone who shags shit outta them, it starts from forplay , right through to after intercourse.
What keeps most men from becomin great lovers truely is selfishness and seeing some women as trophies or goals. Alot of men, (not all) set out on a goal to just give her a poke and boast about his catch. Guys she aint boasting about you when you do this. All the while, while you are smiling about your conquer with your mates , she is more than likely telling her mates too, but not that you were a good lay. No woman will ever boast that she got it good if he just gives a few shoves and thats it. She is tellin her friends and herself “never again”
So you see, its important, whether casual sex or something more commited that both parties enjoy the sex. He can get off anyway and we all know this, but get her turned on and she will become the wild animal you want, but in return you must satisfy her also.
Bottom line is, we are all responsible for our sexual side. What you put out is what you will get returned. No woman will return to the same man if he is dead in bed and doesnt get her off. Her vibrator will do it for her and he will soon become used to his hand if he continues not to take notice of any of his partners.
At the end of the day if you are thinkin “is it me” then really stop and think…
If she makes excuses not to be with you again, its usually because she doesnt know how to tell you, …you just dont do it for her.
A great lover is…….
Considerate, not selfish and takes notice and full focus on his partner.
Not everything that’s old is always bad.Sometimes people like old school.
Sometimes people just want to get things over and done with.
There must have been something nice in older styles of lovemaking , belly slapping or just plain out right shagging, otherwise people wouldn’t have clung to them for so long. Yes we are talking about the classic missionary position of man on top. Mostly these days that position is seen as boring for both male and female.Some poeple like it almost everytime they do the deed but its true that a man who insists on being on top every time is no fun, but trying these positions every once in a while is not a bad thing. Just not all the time.
Ok everyone knows that him on top positions are very good for the man, but we also know that many women don’t always get any pleasure this way.
So couples need to learn to communicate and be open towards each other during sex, because women must take the bull by the horns and tell the men what feels good and what doesn’t to her.. come on ladies he wont know unless you speak up.
One positive about him on top positions is the fact that its fantastic for beginners. Boys who lack experience with sex have an easier time, by being in a position of power.
Lack of confidence is likely to make a young man lose his erection. But this being a power position for him, it will make him more comfortable.
The same goes for the inexperienced lady will also benefit from letting the man take control and letting him do most of the work. As inexperienced girls will often have no clue what they themselves should be doing.
But ladies, you don’t have to lay stiff on the bed like a wall plaque as its not a good thing to do during sex.
Join in the fun. Throw your legs around his hips, or over his shoulders if you are feeling keen. Touch his body while he thrusts inside you and whisper sweet dirty things in his ears, or simply just breathe in his ears.
Yes he will be more aroused than ever knowing that you enjoy yourself and any man who is not for himself will doeverything in his power to bring you to orgasm.
There is no problem with letting your mate think himself in control now and then, as It’s good for both of you to explore everything that sex has to offer. Missionary granted is not the bees knees of sex positions, but alot of men still use it, particularly more mature men.
Missionary has its place in everyones sex life, as not every old-fashioned thing should be thrown away. Sometimes its nice to just be thrown down and just hammered by him being on top.
So you see it doesnt have to be boring, nor do you have to lay there saying ” oh yeah ” while secretly looking at your watch.
Throw yourself in and if he is on top, so what! get in , be dirty and help spice it up.
The days of the men doing all the work and the woman being on her back are over ladies, so get involved.
Like i said he wont know what you like or what you want unless you tell him.
Below is a book we have in store at theloveshop for anyone wanting any ideas on better positions, and believe me its worth a read.You can purchase for $21.95 AU and its worth every cent to spice up any sex life wanting a bit of zing.
Firstly, if you need to ask this question then you already have a big problem. Whether you’re actually bad in bed or just low on confidence, you need to face this issue head on.
For many, the problem lies in the fact that it takes a man with lot of experience to know i if his partner a has an orgasm or if she’s faking it.
Even the most of experienced men can’t always tell if the woman’s faking it or not.
So fellas you can never be sure that your performance is top quality.
Loosing confidence in yourself and throwing good self-esteem out the window just because of the worry you may have, can actually make your sex life decline much much more.
Alot of the time a sexual encounter will go down in history as the worst lay ever..and its usually the fella who is too busy wondering if he pleasing her or if he has a big enough cock.
Fellas regardless of size, work with what you have and believe me when i say this, size does not matter…Its how you use it…yes i am female.
Many things also can put a dampener on your bedroom boogey with her, such as stress. We do live in a stressful world and many people dont get the chance to even have sex as often as they would love to, as we are working longer hours nowadays, let alone the time to think about if he is good enough for her.
Stress is one of the great “sex killers” nowadays because no man can truly enjoy himself if he keeps thinking about deadlines, bosses, problems with co workers, credit card debt and mortgages.
Stress also leads to some men drinking to “relax” and we all know the majority of men cannot perform to full ability with a gut full of booze..
Men need to recognize for themselves the early signs of stress in their lives and take control of the situation.
Once you’ve started asking yourself questions about your performance you could easily slide into a rut where low self esteem takes over, thus performing like a fish.
Turning it around and thinking a bit more positive about things, will greatly improve the sex life.
I am not just talking about your weapon not standing to attention though.
You may need to learn some new positions and break the boring bedroom routine a bit. Try new positions, fantasies, roll play, masturbation, oral sex.
All of these sexual activities yes you have probably done, but take the chance and improve it, take it out of the safety zone of what you have only ever done. All sexual activities, no matter how bad or good they may feel, can always be improved because believe me the more you try new things the more she will respond. Yes somethings she will hate, but its trial and error and sooner or later the question you keep asking yourself about your performance, will no longer come into play for your thoughts.
Bottom line is….listen to your partner, listen to her breathing, her responses to certain touches or activities.
Most couples settle for just having a 10min quicky, rolling over and saying good night.
If you want your relationship to work, then put the effort in to begin with.
IF you are married, all the more reason to start trying new things to keep your sex life active and hot, because you both trust each other and should be able to discuss what you want openly with partner, no matter how “freaky” it may sound.
At the end of the day, only you can decide to change what is bothering you.
Because chances are, if you are struggling with thoughts on your performance, she will be too.
Sex is sex, and is meant to be great, not a bore or a worry. If it has become that, then odds are she thinks exactly the same way and you both need further help if wanting your relationship to work.
Its 50/50 all the way down the line when comes to sex. So ladies you are not off the hook either. Get off your backs and bring spark into the bedroom.
Step into this century and take a firm hold of what sex has to offer these days, whether you are single, gay, lesbian or married.
I am a firm believer in….
“What you put out there from yourself, is what you get returned.”
If you expect a damn good lay, then become one, its not all put on the men for responsibility, to make sure you get a good banging.
Two people fuck, so two people must be involved, meaning he doesnt do all the work